About the episode
What does it actually look like on the other side of passing? Not just the stamp, not just the job title, but the version of yourself that shows up after you stop being your own worst enemy and start being your biggest advocate? In this episode, you get to hear it directly from someone who lived it.
In Episode 31 of The Assessment Alchemist Podcast, Tina Wiles welcomes back Mel Haskins, PE, one year after she passed her professional engineering exam on her tenth attempt. Mel shares what her life looks like now, including a promotion, a move, and a complete shift in how she talks to herself, and reflects on the nine attempts that came before. She opens up about the shame, the self-doubt, the punishing study schedules, and the moment she finally stopped planning for failure and started focusing on passing. This is one of the most honest conversations this podcast has ever had.
Tina and Mel also dig into the idea of normalizing the fail in the engineering world, where the narrative too often centers on the engineers who studied for six weeks and passed easily, leaving everyone else to struggle in silence. Mel shares a moment at a WTS event where simply saying "I took it ten times" out loud shifted the entire conversation at the table, and what it felt like to watch a younger engineer exhale for the first time in years.
Key Points
The mindset shift that made the biggest difference on Mel's tenth attempt was focusing entirely on passing rather than protecting herself from failing. She had been going into every previous exam already planning what she would do when she failed.
Changing how you talk to yourself is not a soft skill. It is a performance tool. Mel went from being her own worst enemy to her biggest advocate, and that shift showed up directly in her test results.
The tools Mel learned for the exam did not stay in the testing center. Breathing techniques, self-awareness around stress, and self-care practices are now part of how she handles high-pressure situations at work.
Studying more is not the same as studying better. Mel spent years adding hours to things she was already good at while avoiding the topics she called "the things I suck at." Facing those honestly was uncomfortable and ultimately essential.
Normalizing the fail removes shame from the conversation and makes it possible for engineers to actually get the help they need. The more Mel talked openly about her ten attempts, the more other engineers said "me too."
Self-care is not a reward for passing. It is part of preparation. The facial Mel booked the day before her final exam, in the same building as the test center, is now a ritual she keeps every six weeks.
The PE stamp does not change who you are as an engineer. It changes what you can do with what you already know.
Magical quotes from the episode
"I knew the material all the other times, but I was able to put what I knew on paper. It was almost like you train for a marathon and then you triple your shoelace on the day of the test."
"I used to say anything anybody said to me couldn't be as bad as how I talked to myself. And now I'm not my worst enemy. I'm my biggest advocate."
"Focus on passing. Be kind to yourself. And never give up because you will pass. You will pass. You will pass."
